(mirrored from https://acheney.xyz/blog/posts/rip-nex-benedict/)
i’ll spare the details, but a couple of weeks ago, only a couple hundred miles from where i am now, a fellow young enby and oklahoma resident was beaten to death in a bathroom they had been forced to use by bullshit state legislation. there has already been discussion, vigils, and much hateful rhetoric about their killing in the time since. i suppose that as a queer person living in this state i’m obligated to add to this discussion myself
personally i’ve only had one incident with being bullied in high school, when i was presenting as a trans girl, but it’s certainly something i won’t forget. i hope those two boys who slapped my books out of my hand and laughed at me have come to terms with themselves and what they did and changed their character. maybe they haven’t, i don’t know. i do know that, other than this incident, i am incredibly privileged and lucky to not have had to deal with this in my life so far. my immediate family has been very accepting of who i am, and so far nobody has provoked me while i’m presenting. honestly i’m surprised nothing has happened to me. i feel very guilty for having acceptance and peace that so many others like me never could have. there are so many young queer people like me and nex, not just in this state but all over the world, who are forced to deal with shit only because of who we are. even based on my experiences, i still fear that i could be the next casualty in this all-out war against us
but why? the cause of this shit is simply hate, fear of change, and unjust power structures who continue to let this happen. particularly here, there’s rampant religious fundamentalism and people who push it leading others to fear those who do not comply to their beliefs. if not religion, it’s pseudo-intellectual snobbery, treating our identities and experiences as literal diseases to be cured. failing that, it’s simple hatred of anyone who dares challenge the status quo. but most importantly, it’s not just a disparate group of individuals, it’s a widespread attitude pushed by those in power
frankly too many of us have either straight up died or fallen into depression and suicidal ideation because of this hatred, and there has to be something done about it
now, we can write as much legislation and do as much grieving as we want, even though it’ll probably fall on deaf ears particularly here in the red states, but these are only temporary solutions. what has to be done is a widespread and total shift in how us people treat each other. there has to be a total dismantling of implicit and possibly explicit power structures. only then can we as a species find comfort and solace in each other. how exactly we should do that or what it’ll mean in the long run i don’t know. i’ll let people smarter and more experienced than i am figure it out
until then, i say that we should take solace in each other and, for those who can, stand up and fight against those who disapprove of us. whether this is through the polls or on the street, we need to assert ourselves and our identities
by the way, fuck you tom woods. you don’t represent oklahoma. and if you hate me for being who i am, then frankly fuck you too. attitudes identical to yours resulted in an unjust death of a precious soul
